Why? Why? Why?

Why do kids never have anything to tell you until it is bedtime?
Why do kids never need you unless you are on the telephone?
Why does my three year old like to ask the same damn questions over and over and over again?
Why is too much chocolate bad for you?
Why is too much wine bad for you?
Why do children do the opposite of what you ask of them?
Why do they make so much laundry?
Why can't they stay little forever?
Why can't they grow up and move out today?
Why can't they pick up toys?
Why must they hang all over you?
Why do they hate to blow their noses?
Why do they whine?
Why can't they keep their rooms clean?
Why don't they do what they are told to do?
Why don't they ever give me a break?
Why do they always wait until I sit down before asking me to get something?
Why must I play Candy Land?
Why can't they get their own water?
Why won't they eat their veggies?
Why do they need to be in with me when I am in the bathroom?
Why do they need me thisminute when I am busy?
Why do they fight?
Why can't they work it out?
Why are they always bored?
Why does Alexander always want to tackle me from behind when I am standing at the counter with a sharp knife?
Why can't anyone replace the paper towels?
Why can't anyone else replenish the empty toilet paper roll?
Why can't my boys remember to lift the seat?
Why must I air condition the outside of my house? Or,
Why can't they close the damned doors every time they come in and out of the house?
Why can't my kitchen floor ever stay clean?
Why can't the kids clear the table?
Why can't they clean up their own spills?
Why are they so messy?
Why can't they understand no?
Why did I have kids?
Why does my youngest get up with the birds?
Why must he wake me up as well?
Why can't he pour his own milk in the morning?
Why can't he make me my coffee?
Why am I still awake?